I'm Sorry

Get out, get out

Get out, get out

Stop telling me

How wrong I've been.

I want to walk out

Move out

Live someplace safe

In peace

I want to live without screams

Without being reminded that I am broken at the seams

Grasses rolling downhill, wind at my hair

The sun at my back, I feel a tug

I open my eyes, to feel soft fur brushing my cheeks

I smile because my happiness is with me

She purrs at seeing me waken

She licks my tears streaming down my face

The warm feeling doesn't last longer

The pounding in my head returns

Louder, Louder, LOUDER!

Like a parasite, it sucks my lifeblood,

Subtly I feel a tug

A prickly sensation that I must let go

But I don't.

I deserve this

I am not worthy of being happy

I remember the very first thought I had:

"Get out, get out

Get out, get out

Stop telling me

How wrong I've been"

But now I think

"Come in, come in

I deserve this break-in

The hurtful truth

That I've ignored in my youth"

I breathe deeply

It doesn't matter anymore

I am bleeding and I can't move

I can only watch the red pool around me

Feeling it staining my skin

I look up, there are hundreds of faces

They're laughing at me

Satisfied to see my end

I open my mouth to say

"I am sorry"

Slowly, they fade

I sob in the ground

My tears mixing with my blood

And I repeat

"I am sorry, I am sorry, I am so, so, sorry"

I say those magical words

Until I feel nothing more than a subtle tug

A prickly sensation telling me to let go

I nod, more tears coming out

I breathe deeply, and say

"Forgive, forgive,

Forgive my tresspasses

I understand now

How wrong I've been"

I feel my body healing

Leaving a hundred scars

I look at them and don't feel shame

I look around and I feel calm

I hear purring, I look down

Happiness is back, with my heart intact

I smile, and the warm fuzzy feeling comes back

I finally can live, with my past at my back.